This article could be considered special in that I am going to be sharing about myself: more specifically, my past self. Many people have known me for a handful of years, and that obscures a whole bunch of things this spectacled
Chindo has done and experienced in life. Even those who have been friends with me for eons may not really be aware of the quirks that have annoyingly clung to me. At present, I can be seen as an incredibly friendly guy who beams his countless smiles in all directions and I believe that a lot of folk get the impression that there is no way implacable hatred nests inside this man's seemingly pure heart. Well, I do hope to live up to this positive image, but it was certainly not the case in the (not-so-)distant past.
You may not believe this, but I used to be an extremist, perhaps to the point of being bigoted. In what sense? I reckon there are various things that can be associated with extremism: in my case, it was religion. At the age of 12, I formally renounced my inherited religion and embraced my chosen one. I was very excited about my new religion and I loved it so much that I would do my best to please my God and not disappoint Him, worshipping the Creator with all my heart, soul, strength, and mind – I was primed to be a devout believer. At first, it may not have been apparent, but it was during this period of religiosity that I thought, acted, and behaved in extreme ways, casting my life into a sepulchral dimension.
How so? I adopted or formed a profoundly damaging attitude. Maybe you yourself can relate to this. As an adherent of one particular religion, I had this view that the members of my religion were superior to those of others. I saw those who were not wearing my religion emblem as second-class humans. To me, they were filthy beings deserving to be hurled into Hell for eternity if they didn't repent and accept my God and religion as the only way to Heaven. And since they were not "the chosen ones", I felt being in close proximity to them would potentially increase my chance of straying away from "the truth", so I tried my best to maintain "a safe distance" from them in order not to be infected by their impurity and falsehood. This is utterly disgusting, isn't it? I clearly remember a crazy habit of mine in which I would try very hard not to suck or inhale the smoke produced by the incense sticks that my dad burned as part of his religious ritual, for example by dashing upstairs (he was doing it on the ground floor) and covering my nose with my T-shirt (though I must admit that this extreme behavior was perhaps molded or solidified by some kind of sermon by a cleric of another religion of the same ilk).
My life was also filled with an intense desire to proselytize infidels, saving them from plunging into "unimaginable darkness". Well, not only that, I felt impelled to rectify sinners belonging to the same religion. One particular memory will stick forever in my mind. I heard that a cousin of mine with the same belief system used contraception, which was forbidden and considered to be a sin according to the teaching of our religion. I had this mental conflict over whether or not to talk to her to make things right (she may not have realized that it was a sin): if I did, I would do the right thing in the eyes of my God, but I would probably end up being disliked or hated for meddling in her business. I finally made up my mind to do so and what I feared did happen: I was admonished for doing what I thought was a noble act.
For me, it was the real Hell. It should have never happened and I am terribly sorry to all of those who were affected by my inappropriate behavior. I am glad that I have gone through a lot of things that have shaped me into who I am today. In my (new) book, the notion that certain human beings deserve to be looked down on is truly nauseating. All of us are humans and our nature is the same – nothing should unjustly segregate us. I would like to express tremendous thanks to science and those who have educated me on this subject, making me a more likeable individual (less prejudiced, more tolerant, etc.) and transforming my life into a much more fulfilling one (one related book that popped up in my mind and would foster this much needed attitude is
Why Dinosaurs Matter by American paleontologist and TED speaker
Kenneth Lacovara). I also cherish personal space and perfectly understand that one can do whatever they want inasmuch as it only affects them themselves.
I am now a liberated person. In this way I can achieve my full potential, unleashing what is untapped, and contribute to the world in a much more meaningful and effective way. And I am really excited about it. π
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